It is frequently
possible for such a man, with the help of his wife, to overcome the problem, by
approaching sex more leisurely. We would like to note, too, that premature
ejaculation has varied meanings. In one medical center, a man may be considered
a premature ejaculator if he cannot sustain the sex act for 30 seconds;
elsewhere the standard may be a minute.
Some physicians suggest that more realistically
a man may be considered to have a premature ejaculation problem when he cannot
control his sexual processes long enough to satisfy his partner in at least
half of their attempts. Is there excessive concern about orgasm? Often, there
is.
There is much more to the sexual relationship than this "end point"
release. But when couples become concerned with this one goal above all others,
they may do everything but enjoy themselves. The whole lovemaking process
should be enjoyed. And for some people who have had problems, concentration on
the pleasures of caresses, without thought of climax, can help unblock sexual
response.
What causes frigidity in a woman? As we have indicated,
failure to have orgasm does not necessarily mean a woman is frigid. Doctors
speak of true frigidity as the inability to derive pleasure from sexual
relations. This may be caused by insufficient lubrication or lack of adequate
stimulation. Frigidity also may stem from psychological factors, conscious or
unconscious feelings of guilt, inferiority, or fears, such as fear of
pregnancy, of growing up, of surrendering to a man.
Women sometimes suffer from
sexual self-consciousness because society has demanded sexual purity of them
before marriage and suddenly demands whole-hearted participation in marriage.
Some women find it difficult to make the transition. Yet the potential is
there.
